Killer Habits
by musicaddiction3
Summary: After the Cullens left Bella broken in forks Bella picks up some nasty habits to keep her from thinking about the pain that is left over from the Cullens. Bella is perfectly content with the way she is living her life but what if the Cullens came back?
1. Edward's Departure

Chapter One

Edward's Departure

BPOV

Something was wrong. Edward hadn't said a word to me during school and I could see how tense he was just by the way he walked. Edward drove me home just like always, but when we pulled up to my house he just sat in the car without saying anything.

"Edward what's going on? You've been acting weird all week."

My voice was enough to pull Edward out of his thoughts and he turned to look at me.

"Bella would you take a walk with me? We need to talk."

"Sure."

Edward smiled at me and then came and opened the door for me. I got out of the silver Volvo slowly not sure of what was going on or of the reasons why Edward was acting so cold and distant toward me.

Edward grabbed my hand and led me to the woods that were only about 100 ft away from my house. We had only been walking for about 30 seconds when he stopped and turned to face me.

"Bella, we're leaving."

I sighed in relief when I heard what he had said. I wasn't really expecting this but at least I could handle it. I would just have to come up with a story to tell Charlie before we left. I was curious about his reasons though. What had made him come to this conclusion?

"Alright, but why are we leaving? Edward what's going on?"

"Bella when I said we…I meant my family and myself. This isn't working out."

I looked at him and couldn't believe what I had just heard. It didn't make any sense to me.

"I'm sorry, I just hallucinated. What?"

Edward spoke his next words slowly and clearly.

"Bella, this," he said indicating the space in between us with his hand, "isn't working out. You aren't good for me Bella and this relationship isn't good for either of us."

Edward's words hit me hard this time and I knew exactly what he was trying to say to me. My heart was being ripped slowly into pieces as my mind comprehended exactly what Edward meant by his words. How well I knew that I wasn't good enough for him. But it didn't make any sense. He had always told me that he loved me. My state of insignificance had never been a problem before. It had never bothered him that I was only a human in the past. Something must have happened to cause him to change his mind so suddenly.

"Edward…did I do something wrong…something to offend you or your family? Because if I did I'm sorry. I can change if I have to Edward. Just tell me what I did and I'll make up for it. Edward, what did I do!"

With each word I spoke I became more and more convinced that I was the one at fault here. He shook his head at me and simply said,

"You didn't do anything wrong Bella. You're just too human, too fragile to be around my family all the time. Besides you humans are all the same. If you've seen one you've seen them all. You're so fickle and you'll do anything for money or sex. Our world is not meant to be shared with your kind and you've become too involved in our business already.

"Then change me Edward! Change me and take me with you!" I was starting to unravel emotionally and even I could hear the desperation and hysteria in my voice.

"Bella I don't want you to come with me."

"You…don't…want…me?"

Edward slowly shook his head back and forth, and tears began to well up in my eyes. I tried everything I could think of to keep me from crying in front of him, but nothing seemed to work and the tears spilled over and made trails down my face.

The only thing that I could do now was either beg him to stay with me or take me with him or to just let him leave. And I simply wasn't capable of letting him go.

"Edward please. I'll do anything, I love you."

Edward smiled at me sadly and shook his head a second time. Defeat and despair welled up inside of me and I dropped down on to my knees when my legs wouldn't support me anymore and began sobbing into my hands.

"Don't worry Bella. Your mind is a sieve and memories fade easily over time for your kind. You'll be all right. Bella I need you to make me a promise before I go."

I looked up at him desperately wanting to please him, to make him reconsider. I looked into his eyes and saw some emotion that disappeared before I could distinguish it.

"Bella I need you to promise me that you won't go and do anything reckless once I'm gone. You have to think about your family now." My family…my family was abandoning me without a second thought. I nodded numbly wanting to keep him with me for as long as possible. Edward smiled at me again but it didn't even come close to reaching his eyes.

"Goodbye Bella."

And with that Edward Cullen was gone from my life. I got up desperately trying to follow him into the woods. I needed to be with him and yet he didn't seem to need me at all. I don't know how long I walked or where I was going but all I knew was that I had to find Edward and fix things. Edward's words kept echoing in my head like some cruel person had pressed the repeat button in my mind.

Deep in my heart I knew that Edward was right though. I wasn't good enough for him and I never had been or would be good enough for him as long as I was human and had a heart that was beating. I walked with these thoughts assaulting me for hours before I tripped and didn't get up. Edward didn't love me and that was all that mattered anymore. I lay there and cried silently for what seemed like an eternity until I heard people calling my name. I didn't answer and it was a long time before it even occurred to me that I should have. As far as I was concerned though nothing mattered anymore. There was a rustling in the bushes near my feet and it sounded like a large animal that was sniffing around for some dinner. I wasn't concerned. The animal went away after just a couple of minutes. Apparently I wasn't good enough for the animal either. After the animal went away a very tall man stepped out from behind the bushes and foliage. He leaned down and said,

"Bella. I'm Sam Uley. Have you been hurt?"

I didn't answer him so he just shrugged and picked me up. I could tell that he was running, but only just. It began to get brighter so I closed my eyes and listened as Sam called out to someone.

"Here, over here, I found her." Then I blacked out.

I woke up after what seemed to be a couple of hours in my own bed. Everything hurt, including my heart. Sleep hadn't lessened the pain that I was feeling, it only prolonged it. I felt all the pain from before and them some as I thought about everything that I had lost and began to cry some more. My family had left without me, without even giving me a chance to say goodbye. Families were supposed to always be there for one another and mine had packed up and left without any warning. My chest hurt with every breath I took making it almost impossible to breathe. It only took me a moment to decide that I couldn't think about _**them **_anymore. It just hurt too much.

My mind started to drift and I suddenly remembered my birthday presents! I still had my birthday presents from them! I raced to my closet and pulled out my photo album. Suddenly the things that I had wanted so badly to forget were some of the most important things in my life. They were mementos of the happiest time of my life. Mementos that represented the time that I had spent with Him. I flipped open the cover of the photo album and saw to my utter disappointment that all of the pictures were gone leaving only dates in permanent marker as any indication that they had been there at all. I ran to my CD player and found it vacant of the CD that had occupied it just this morning. Everything was gone. The useless photo album that had seemed priceless a moment before fell to the floor as I realized one thing. _**He **_was officially out of my life …and I simply couldn't take it. I began to cry some more and I was only vaguely aware of my body hitting the floor as my world spiraled out of control.


	2. Meeting Jay

Chapter Two

Meeting Jay

**BPOV**

**3 months later**

I was done. Period. I had been making an effort for Charlie's sake to make it look like I had moved on. However I wasn't fooling anyone and Charlie had made it quite clear this afternoon that if I didn't pull it together soon, I would be shipped off to a shrink in Jacksonville. I had been doing my best to live like I had before _**He **_had been in my life but my best obviously wasn't enough. So after Charlie had lectured me all afternoon I decided that I would end this for both our sakes.

I got into my beloved truck and headed for Port Angeles hoping that I would be able to find some way too end my dreary existence there. I shuddered as memories of a certain family ran through my mind. I quickly got rid of the mere thought of their name. I couldn't think about _**them **_unless I wanted to end up curled up in the fetal position on the floor though, so I quickly pushed all the memories deep into the back of my mind with all the others that were screaming to get out. I drove around town a little bit until I found a part of town that looked like it had promise. Then I sat quietly and waited for it to get dark.

It didn't take long for the sun to disappear over the edge of the horizon making the lights on the streets turn on, one by one. I got out of the car and began to walk slowly around the block looking for anything that might be fatal or any sign of trouble that I could find. I was busy trying to find anything that may end my life when I noticed three men a little older than myself huddled in the middle of a dark and dirty alleyway. Suddenly memories of that night in Port Angeles flooded my mind. I shuddered as I recalled _**Him **_rescuing me and telling me to get in the car. This seemed like the perfect way to die.

As soon as I saw the group my heart rate picked up in speed and I felt the rush of adrenaline pulse through my arteries. I smiled as I noticed my reactions to the dangerous looking men in the alleyway. This was exactly what I was looking for. This was exactly what I needed. I started walking toward the men in the alley and one by one they looked up at me. They were truly scary looking guys. All three of them were pierced and tattooed from head to toe and looked meaner than a buck of anger hornets. The man that was closest to me looked like he had been greased from head to toe and smelled even worse than he looked.

He turned to really look at me and a slow smile spread over his oily face. He nudged the man who was standing next to him without taking his eyes off me.

"Hey Jay, I think you have a new customer."

The man named Jay stepped around his greasy friend and began to walk toward me. He looked to be about 6' 1" and had dark blonde hair that was pulled back into a sloppy ponytail.

"Hey sweetheart, what can I get for you? Crack, Ecstasy, Heroine, I've got them all."

Reality hit me like a slap in the face as I realized that they weren't looking to kill me or leave me for dead in the streets of Port Angeles. Jay saw and misunderstood my hesitation and smiled at me.

"Oh, it looks like we've got ourselves a first timer boys."

The other two men came over and stood right behind me like they wanted to prevent me from backing out now and making a run for it. The greasy one spoke.

"Well sweetheart if I were you, I'd try the crack. It gives you one hell of a high."

I shrugged and turned to Jay.

"Sorry guys but this wasn't what I was looking for. I'm just not interested."

"Oh really, Well what exactly are you looking for?" Said the greasy one as he looked me up and down in a perverted way that made my heart pick up speed and change my mind about the way that I wanted to die.

"I just wanted to find something that will make all of my problems go away for a little while. Something that will make me happier than I am now." Jay had been listening intently to everything I had said and was now digging into his pockets.

"Here," He said handing me a small baggy filled with a fine white powder, "Try this." I shook my head and replied,

"I don't have any money on me right now."

"Don't worry about it. This one's on me."

I took the baggy and headed back to my truck when Jay called after me.

"I'll be here tomorrow night if you're interested." I ignored him and quickly headed back to my truck and drove home thinking about the bag that was burning a hole in my pocket the entire way home.

I raced upstairs to my room as soon as I got home. Charlie was dead asleep even though it was only 10:00 pm and for that I was grateful; I didn't want him coming into my room if I was going to do this. All my life I had been told that drugs were bad for me and I should do everything I could to stay away from them. But was it really so bad? As far as I could tell this was my last option that I had before suicide, and anything was better than suicide, right? Charlie had made his position clear when he had lectured me this afternoon and as far as I could tell he just wanted me to be normal. I had to perk up or I was headed on a one way flight to Jacksonville. Drugs would help me "perk up" and as far as I could tell I didn't have anything left to lose. It took me less than ten minutes to finally decide that I would try the drugs just to see if it helped at all. Now I just had to figure out how to do it.

I had seen it before on T.V. so I wasn't entirely clueless. I carefully created two lines on my deck with the fine white contents of the baggie. I grabbed a piece of paper out of a discarded notebook and rolled it up into a straw. Then I used one finger to plug my other nostril and I snorted the pure drug into my system.

I quickly cleaned up the evidence and then I sat and waited to see if the pain would go away. I didn't have to wait long. After about two minutes I began to see things differently. Things became sharper and more defined and yet I was also in a trance like state, definitely out of it by any standard. It was pure bliss. For the first time in a very long time I felt whole again. This was exactly what I had been looking for. All my problems had vanished. I was happier than I had been in a very long time. I lay there for a while and then finally drifted off into a deep Cullen free sleep.

When I woke up the next morning I had a killer migraine head ache but I was pumped. I had finally found a solution to all my problems. I immediately retrieved the baggie from its hiding place and snorted the remaining powder. Then I grabbed all of my money that wasn't in my miniscule college fund and got ready for school. I knew that I would go and see Jay again tonight and that I would need all the money I had so that I could get all the drugs I would need to last me through the week.

Charlie was in the kitchen when I headed in there for breakfast and when he looked up at me I smiled at him. Charlie looked back down at the paper that he was reading and then gave himself whip lash as he turned back and did a double take. I quickly grabbed a granola bar and a water bottle as Charlie stared at me.

"Good morning Charlie."

"Morning." He replied looking more confused and happy with each passing second. Charlie was still scratching his head when I walked out the door with my water bottle in hand.

School was great. Everybody gave me the same look that Charlie had when I smiled at them. I frowned as I realized how out of it I must have been to have everybody react this way. But then I smiled as I realized that everybody was going to get to know the new me. I walked over to Mike and greeted him with a warm smiled and a good morning leaving him completely dazed. It was utterly fantastic. I wasn't until lunch that my high started to wear off and I began to feel uncomfortable. Time seemed to slow down tremendously as I waited for school to end. I wanted more drugs. No, I NEEDED more drugs in order to survive the day. Already I could feel the gaping hole in my chest open up like an old wound.

As soon as school was over I made a bee line for my truck. I was beginning to feel anxious and I didn't like it. I finished my homework after what seemed like forever and made Charlie's dinner. As soon as it was finished and sitting in the oven I was in my truck and on my way to Port Angeles. It didn't take long for me to find the same parking space that I had occupied to night before. But then I had to wait. Waiting was pure torture. I couldn't take it. I was so close to happiness and relief that I could taste it…and I had to wait. I waited for as long as I could stand and then I got out and walked around for a while.

I smiled to myself as I thought about what _**His **_reaction would be to my drug use and to my new behavior. It served _**Him **_right. I didn't see any reason to keep my promise. _**He'd**_ never kept any of _**His**_. The sun finally set and I decided that it wasn't too early to go and find Jay. So I hurried over to the alley and sure enough Jay was standing there with his back pressed up against the alley waiting.

I quickly walked into the alley and headed over to where he waited for me. Jay smiled when he saw me and began digging around in his pockets.

"So," He said casually. "You liked it."

"Yes. I want more of whatever you gave me last night." Jay smiled at me again and said,

"I don't have any more of what I gave you but try this instead." He replied handing me a large and intimidating needle.

"What is it?"

"Just try it." I looked at him for a long moment and then decided that I trusted him enough to take his word for it.

"Alright, how do I do this?" Jay gently took my arm in his hands and turned it so my inner arm was naked and exposed. Then he took the syringe and held it just above the crease in my arm where he hesitated and looked up at me.

"Can you pay?" I nodded and handed him the wad of cash that I had brought with me. Jay fanned through the money and then continued with his lesson after he was satisfied.

"You want to get it into the vein." He said quietly. Then he stuck the needle deep into my arm and injected the drug into my system. The results were immediate and amazing. It was pure bliss. After Jay had given me the rest of the drugs that my was of money had bought, I asked him,

"What was that anyway? It's incredible."

"Heroine." I nodded and smiled to myself at the irony of the entire situation. I may have been _**His**_ special brand of heroine but now I had my own and unlike him, I wasn't going to give it up any time soon. I began to walk back to my car when Jay grabbed my arm and wrote a number on it.

"Call me when you need more, or when you want company." I smiled and gave him a little wink and then started walking toward my car again when he called after me.

"Hey, what's your name?"

"Bella and you are Jay?" He shook his head at me and replied,

"No, I'm James. Call me James." I nodded and then got into my truck and drove home as I enjoyed my first taste of Heroine.


	3. Payment

Chapter 3

Payment

**BPOV**

My life was fantastic when I was high and a complete disaster when I wasn't. I would meet James on a weekly basis to get more drugs so I could survive. Charlie was absolutely clueless about the drugs and I intended to keep it that way. Charlie thought that I had a new boyfriend that lived in Port Angeles and kept pestering me to bring him home so that he could meet him. That wasn't going to happen anytime soon with Charlie being a cop and all.

My old friends at school knew that something was up with me. I was moody all the time now and I would constantly lash out at anybody who brought it up. When I was high I was happy and flirty with almost everyone. When my high started to wear off I wouldn't hesitate to call somebody an insulting name. Mike in particular was extremely clueless though. He was a lot like a lost puppy that had started following me around ever since he had gotten to know that flirty me. I would kiss him sometimes to piss off Jessica and make it so she would shut up every once in a while. Jacob on the other hand was starting to become more and more suspicious. That was all right with me though. Ever since he had joined Sam's little gang he couldn't have cared less about me.

The drugs and alcohol began to change me. I noticed a huge change in my confidence level. My wardrobe began to change too. I didn't mind wearing short, tight skirts and skin tight jeans. It made James happy and when James was happy he made me happy. Work was the worst part of my life. I couldn't show up to the shop high or drunk because then I would be risking my job. I needed my job to pay for my drug supply. I got through it though.

I was lost in thought thinking about all these things when my cell phone buzzed. I smiled when I saw James number and flipped it open.

"B, Need more? Meet me club lightning 10. J"

I smiled at the thought of another high and went to change. I straightened my long dark hair and changed into a black halter top dress that hugged the curves that I had and fit me like a glove. Then I put on some dark eyeliner and 3" black heels. I looked at my reflection and smiled in approval. I looked hot and I knew it.

After I was ready I took out my drug supply or my merchandise as James liked to call it and shot up the remainder of my Heroine supply. I knew that I would get more from James tonight. I grabbed my purse and the keys to my truck and headed downstairs. Charlie's eyes almost popped out of his head when he saw me.

"Now just hold on a minute young lady. Bella where do you think you're going?"

"Dancing with James."

"Not dressed like that you're not."

"Yes I am. I'm 18 years old; I can do what I want."

"Not when you're living in my house you can't."

"Fine, have it your way!" And with that I went back up to my room and climbed out my window and down the tree. Then I started my truck and headed to Port Angeles.

I drove as fast as my slow truck would go anxious to see James. I spotted the club and quickly parked my truck. I walked into the club and found James sitting in a corner with several other people that I had never seen before. James stood and came over to me when he saw me.

"Hey Bella, you look hot." Then he leaned down and kissed me. The kiss was nice but nothing like the kisses I've had in the past. He led me to the table and handed me a drink. I downed it quickly not even taking the time to taste the alcoholic beverage. It wasn't long before I was dancing with a guy that had been with James when I had walked in. We were bumping and grinding and then James came and cut in.

I was actually having a great time. I was completely drunk and James and I were having fun on the dance floor. James leaned down and whispered in my ear,

"Hey why don't we get out of here and I can give you some more merchandise." I nodded dumbly and staggered out of the club with a completely sober James at my side. James led me to his Mercedes and held the door open for me. I was having a hard time paying attention and the next thing I knew we were parked in front of a motel. I got out of the car and made my way to the door that James was holding open for me. I walked into the room and lay down on the bed. James came and lay next to me and said,

"Bella I'll get those drugs for you alright?" I nodded and he went and put all of the drugs in my purse then he came and lay by me again. I leaned over and grabbed my purse. Then I pulled out my wad of cash and made a motion to hand it to him. But James just shook his head and put the cash back into my purse. I was extremely confused. I doubted that he was going to give me the drugs for free but I couldn't figure out what was going on.

James smiled at me and said,

"Bella I don't want your money tonight. I think that we should make a different arrangement." I nodded and waited for him to continue. "Bella, I don't want your money but I do want you."

Then James leaned in and kissed my more passionately than he ever had before. I was too drunk to even care at the moment. He kissed me and I lay back on the bed. He hovered over my body as he lay over me and then he began to push up my dress. I didn't know why but this bothered me. I readjusted myself so that his hand wasn't under my dress without breaking the kiss. James adjusted himself and continued to grope me under my dress. I didn't like it. It felt wrong.

"James stop." James stopped for a moment and looked at me.

"James I don't want to do this right now. I just need some time."

"No Bella, This is your payment for those drugs I gave you."

"But James I don't want to."

"Bella, if you want any more drugs from me you will."

I sat straight up and punched him in the face hard enough to knock him unconscious. I grabbed my purse and staggered out of the motel room. I reached around and found my cell phone and hit the first number on speed dial knowing that he would help me. He answered on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Jake, can you come pick me up?"

"Bells? Where are you?" I looked around for anything that might look familiar to me in my drunken state and saw the club that I had been at earlier. "Club lightning in Port Angeles." My words were slurring together and I could tell that Jacob was concerned.

"I'll be right there. Bella don't try and go anywhere." I slurred something in response and then I hung up and went and sat in my truck. I noticed how cold it was for the first time after I had climbed into my truck. I struggled but finally managed to put my keys in the ignition and turn on the heater. I waited and waited but it never got warm so I turned it off and lay down in the cab of the truck. I thought about what had happened and began to cry as I realized what had happened.

Someone knock on my car window hard. I jumped and saw that it was only Jake. I began crying even harder though because it had scared me. Jake opened the door on the passenger side after I had unlocked the doors and climbed into the cab with me. He quickly reached over and pulled me into his warm embrace. I cried for a little bit longer but then I began to doze. I was hardly conscious when Jake buckled me into the passenger seat and took my place in the driver's side. I closed my eyes and was surrounded by nothing but the dark for a long while. When I opened my eyes again Jake had just turned off the car and had reached over to unbuckle my seat belt. I sat up and the next thing I knew I had gotten out of my car and was on my hands and knees in front of Jake's house throwing up all over the lawn. Then I passed out again.

The next morning I woke up in Jacob's bed. I looked around the room quickly for any sign of Jacob and saw an empty sleeping bag that had obviously been slept in on the other side of the room. I had a killer headache and I stumbled into the bathroom to attempt to make myself feel any better. Jacob had written me a note in black dry erase marker all over the mirror that read,

_Bella,_

_I had some things that I had to take care of but I will be back very soon. I hope that you will wait for me to get back. We are definitely going to talk about what happened last night! Charlie knows that you are safe but you are in major trouble for leaving in the first place._

_ Wait for me,_

_ Love Jake _

I felt a panic attack come on as I thought about Jake finding out about all the drugs that I had been taking. He wouldn't hesitate to tell Charlie or worse take them away from me. I couldn't let that happen and that would happen if we talked about last night. Jake had a way of getting information from me that no one else except a certain ex-boyfriend had. I felt the expected waves of pain that coursed through my body at the thought of that someone. I couldn't handle this. I opened the bathroom door after I had washed my face and came face to face with Jacob.

"I had a feeling that you weren't going to wait for me which is why I hurried back." I snorted at this and pushed my way passed him. I couldn't do this now. But Jake was persistent and apparently very impatient to learn about everything that was going on. "Bella what happened, what has been going on in your life for the past five months that has been changing you so drastically." I just shook my head and went to grab my car keys and my purse from the night stand. I almost squealed in surprise when Jacob cornered me against the wall and put both of his hands on either side of my face preventing escaped until he permitted. "Bella what happened."

"Alright you want to know what's going on in my life I'll tell you. 8 months ago my boyfriend and his family left me telling me that they didn't love me or care about me anymore. They told me that I was pathetic and that they had moved on to bigger and better things. When they left they tore apart my life. Then I grew closer to my best friend. The nightmares went away for a while and I thought that I was finally moving on too. I felt like I was healing and getting better with every moment that I spent with my best friend. However life had other plans for me. My best friend went and joined the local gang and told me he never wanted to see me again ripping what was left of my heart out of my already mangled chest. So I had nothing to live for. I tried my best to move on and live my life the way it was before I had known my ex-boyfriend and ex-best friend. I couldn't do it. So I drove to Port Angeles with the intention of ending my life in the city. Then I met someone new. Someone who acted like they wanted me and made the pain go away for a little while. He talked me out of killing myself and made me happy again. We had fun together and last night was supposed to be just that, fun. Let's just say that things didn't go the way he expected and we broke up and I called my ex- best friend to come and pick me up because I was too drunk to drive home and couldn't call my father. That's it. That's my shitty excuse of a life and frankly right now I don't really want to talk about it with anyone, especially you."

I pushed Jacob away and went and grabbed my things. Jacob was still standing in stunned silence right where I had left him when I walked out of his room and out of his house. I could feel the tears flowing down my cheeks but I didn't care. I had other things that I needed to worry about. I didn't know how long I could make my supply last and I needed to find someone else who would sell me the drugs that James wouldn't. I walked over to my truck and pulled open the heavy door preparing to get in and take off. Just then Jake decided to make a recovery from the shock that I had put him in.

"Bella wait." I just shook my head and got into my truck. I closed and locked the doors and put the key in the ignition.

"Bella please, let me explain. It's not what you think." I pulled out of the driveway quickly and floored it out of La Push. I didn't know what I was going to do. Jake had been my last hope and my last resort. I had a feeling that life was going to become completely unbearable in the very near future and I was afraid that it was going to break me this time.


	4. Withdrawals and Surrenders

Chapter Four

Withdrawals and Surrenders

**BPOV**

I felt my control over my life slowly slipping away as my drug supply grew smaller and smaller with every high I had. I tried my best to take only the bare minimum but my addiction prevented me from taking less than 500 mg a day. I was starting to unravel both emotionally and physically. I had to find another drug dealer soon otherwise I was going to lose it. I stayed in my room most of the time now not even bothering to go to school claiming that I was sick. I was shaky all the time and I felt like I had an itch that I just couldn't scratch. I felt anxious and dizzy. I wasn't eating anymore. My body didn't want food anymore it wanted the drugs that I didn't have. It dragged on like this for a good week and a half before I was on my last high. It only took me a half an hour without drugs in my system before I decided that I had to find James. Maybe he would take pity on me and take my money after all.

I waited until Charlie had left for the police station and then I grabbed an even bigger sum of money than I had the last time and made my way to Port Angeles. I was shaking the entire way and was driving well over the speed limit trying to get to James as quickly as possible. When I finally made it to the city I parked my truck and grabbed my cell phone. I found James number and quickly texted him.

"J, I NEED more. Please tell me where to meet you. I need them ASAP." I sent off the text and waited for his reply. It came ten minutes later.

"B, I don't know if I can do that. The last time I tried to give you drugs you stole my drugs and left me unconscious in a motel room. I don't think things are going to work out. J"

"J, PLEASE, I will do ANYTHING!"

"Alright…meet me at the motel 6 in half an hour."

"THANK YOU J."I sat in my car and waited as the minutes slowly passed by. It had only been about 5 minutes when a small hand rapped on my window. I jumped in surprise and looked out my window. I jumped again when I realized exactly who it was. Alice Cullen. I rolled down my window just enough and said,

"Alice what are you doing here."

"Oh Bella I wanted so badly to see you and here you are. I can't believe you're here. We all miss you so much and we all wanted to see you. Any way I had a vision of you and saw where you were and I just had to come and see you…" Alice was hiding something. I could tell by the way she kept rambling on and on about things that really didn't matter at this point. I couldn't handle this right now. I was anxious and shaking terribly from my lack of drugs and I was going to get some more very soon and the last thing that I wanted to deal with right now was Alice and the rest of the Cullens.

"Alice I can't do this right now I have someplace to be."

"Oh Bella please stay. It wouldn't hurt you to stay and chat for a while." I shook my head and put my hands on the steering wheel. They were shaking like leaves. Alice's gaze zeroed in on my shaking hands and I knew that she was suspicious. I grabbed the steering wheel hard trying to make my hands stop shaking and I said. "Look Alice it was nice seeing you again but I really have to go now." Alice tried to say something put I drowned her out with the roar from my engine. Then I back out quickly. I was shaking even harder than before and I'm pretty sure that it wasn't all from the drugs. What had Alice been doing here in Port Angeles anyway? I didn't know and I didn't care I just needed to get those drugs ASAP.

I almost cried with relief as I parked my car in the motel six parking lot. All I could think about was how I was going to get my drugs. I wasn't even thinking about what that entailed. I waited until I saw James's Mercedes pull into the parking lot before I got out of my truck. I watched him go to the front desk and get a room for us. I walked over to him and waited as the clerk got the key. James took the key and led me to a room that was as far from the front desk as possible. He opened the door and held it open for me. I walked into the room without hesitating and waited quietly for him.

"Alright Bella, where is my payment." I took out the wad of cash and handed it to him. James thumb through the sum and nodded in approval as he pocketed the money. Then he looked at me expectantly.

"Well that cover's what you owe me from before. Now if you want any more drugs you know exactly what I want." I nodded and removed my jacket and shoes and crawled onto the bed. James smiled at me and crawled onto the bed and positioned himself so that he lay on top of me. I tried to keep all of the memories back but after seeing Alice all I could think about was Him and how this was supposed to be Him and not James. So I closed my eyes and pretended like it was Him. Tears flowed freely down my cheeks as I thought about Him and his family and how much I still loved them. James kissed me deeply and I kissed him back thinking about the drugs that I would receive in return. His hands traveled all over my body and then he unbuttoned his pants and reached for the zipper of my dress. I thought about everything that was happening and all I could do was cry.

When James was finished with me, he got dressed and threw my clothes at me. Then he handed me a large baggy full of all the drugs that I needed for another week and said,

"I'll text you about getting more merchandise. Just wait for my text." Then he walked out the door without waiting for a reply from me. I quietly and slowly got dressed. Then I grabbed my things and walked out of the motel room and slowly climbed into my truck. I drove to the nearest bar and ordered the most alcoholic drink that I could see on the menu and then I went and sat in the loudest corner I could find and did my best to drown out my thoughts with one drink after another.

About an hour later Alice walked into the club and right over to my table. She eyed me with disapproval and took my drink away from me. I was completely wasted. I couldn't see straight or talk straight and it wouldn't be long before I passed out completely. Alice sat down next to me and said quietly,

"Just what the hell do you think you're doing?" I just laughed at her and said,

"James gave me exactly what I deserved." My words were extremely slurred but I could tell that Alice knew what I had said because she looked at me like I was crazy.

"I don't even care about you or…Him or even about James. I don't care about anything anymore. "Then I started to sob for no apparent reason. Alice held me and tried to comfort me. Alice held me until I had stopped crying for the most part and then she helped me up and paid my bill.

"Come on Bella you're coming with me." I tried to protest but I couldn't seem to focus on anything at all. I made it all the way to Carlisle's quiet Mercedes and then I blacked out.

**APOV**

I found Bella in the bar right where I knew she would be and she was completely drunk. Oh Bella, Edward's not going to like this. She was rambling on about how she had gotten what she deserved and then she broke down and cried. I held her for a long time planning out my revenge against James as Bella cried onto my shoulder. I had seen almost everything that had happened in that little motel room and it had made my heart ache for Bella. I couldn't believe everything that I had seen. This was simply unacceptable, finally I decided that since Charlie couldn't handle this Bella would come and stay with us. I picked Bella up and helped her walk out the door and to Carlisle's car. Bella finally passed out in the front seat of Carlisle's car and for that I was grateful.

I drove as quickly as I could, knowing that the sooner I got Bella there the better. I had a bad feeling that Bella was into some deep trouble; Deeper than even I had anticipated. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed Carlisle's number as I zipped past other drivers going well over a 120 mph. Carlisle didn't answer. I swore to myself and tried again. He still didn't answer so I left a short message saying that I was bringing Bella back to the house and to make sure that everything and everyone was prepared for it.

About 4 hours later we pulled into our driveway. I pulled in slowly and then helped a very unconscious and very drunk Bella out of the car. As Bella began to wake up a little she pushed me away and stumbled but didn't fall. She tripped and fell and threw up all over our yard. Great! I thought to myself now everyone is going to know she's here but the smell of her vomit. Esme was not going to like this. I helped her up and pulled her into the large house that we had bought when we had moved after Edward had told us to.

I walked in to the house and wasn't surprised when I found it empty. Carlisle was at the hospital and Esme had gone shopping. Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper had all gone hunting and heaven only knew where Edward was. I carried Bella upstairs and put her in the guest room knowing that Bella wouldn't be able to handle waking up in Edward's room. I took off her pumps and almost fell over when I noticed that they were 3 "heels. For the first time I took in what Bella was actually wearing and I approved. She was wearing a tight blue dress that went down to her mid thigh with black peep toe pumps. Her hair was curled and she was wearing makeup and large silver hoop earrings. Bella looked gorgeous. I don't know what had happened but whatever it was couldn't have been all bad.

I put her purse next to her on the night stand and went downstairs to get a few things ready. I tried calling Carlisle again but he didn't answer so I called Jasper instead.

"Jasper, when are you coming home?"

"I'm on my way now. Why, what's going on Alice."

"Is Edward with you?"

"…yes…"

"Just hurry home please and just be prepared."

I called Esme next and told her to stop by the hospital and pick up Carlisle on her way back to the house. I heard Bella stirring upstairs and then I saw a vision of her climbing out the window. I sighed and went upstairs in time to see Bella staring at the window.

"Are you feeling any better Bella? You can't be feeling too hot right now considering the fact that you're still very drunk and in the care of vampires. I will be right downstairs if you need anything, and Bella, don't even think about it." I said all of this and then went to get her some Tylenol to help the headache that she would undoubtedly have once the inevitable hangover caught up with her the next day. I brought her the Tylenol and a glass of water and then I locked the windows and the door on my way out. Then I went outside to wait for the ever cheerful Edward.


	5. The Cullens and the consequences

Chapter 5

The Cullen's and the Consequences

**EPOV**

Jasper drove faster than usual after he had received that strange phone call from Alice telling him to come home prepared. But prepared for what? Alice was hiding something from me that was for sure. She had asked Jasper if I was with him and when the answer was yes she didn't say any more about the situation. I could hear Jasper's worried thoughts and Rosalie's vain ones. Emmett was being unusually quiet. I didn't know what Alice could be hiding from me. She knew that nothing mattered to me anymore except for Bella of course. Oh Bella! I loved her so much and I wanted to be with her again. But fate had other plans for Bella and I found that I couldn't be around Bella without hurting her in the long run. I missed Bella desperately but I could only assume that she had moved on by now. 8 months is a long time for humans and Bella probably didn't remain single long after I left. I cringed at the thought of her in someone else's arms and quickly stopped the thought dead in its tracks.

I was still wrapped up in my thoughts when we pulled up into our driveway and everybody in the car except me stiffened. I quickly shook myself out of my thoughts and attempted to pay closer attention to what was going on. I looked around as the car came to a stop but I couldn't see anything. Finally I took a deep breath in after a while without breathing and froze. The entire area smelled like Bella and something else. I couldn't quite place what it was but I didn't have too. Emmett quickly connected the scent with a memory of the time that he had gotten so drunk that he had passed out after dancing like a chicken at the local bar. I quickly recognized the smell as alcohol. I almost gagged as the smell of alcohol became the most potent scent in the car. I got out of the car and raced inside the house knowing exactly what Alice was hiding from me. I was furious.

I went through the door and was inside the kitchen in much less than a second. Alice was sitting at the dining room table waiting for us with Carlisle and Esme at her sides.

"Alice what exactly is going on? I know that you are trying to hide something about Bella from me. And I don't know what it is yet but I will find out." Carlisle spoke in response to my outburst.

"Edward calm down and have a seat. Alice is going to explain everything to all of us once. Just be patient and you will find out everything that is going on."

I listened to Carlisle and then I decided that he was right. I would get more information out of Alice if I just listened to everything that she had to say. She better have some good explanations though and she better deliver them quickly or else there would be hell to pay.

**BPOV**

I woke up in a strange bed. I was used to waking up in strange beds just not fully clothed. I was still wearing the same dress from the night before and suddenly I could remember the gist of what had happened. My head was killing me. I walked into the bathroom and got into the shower knowing that they wouldn't mind.

I washed everything with a bar of soap and washed my long hair thoroughly. I got out and put the same dress back on once I had dried myself off and wrapped a towel around my wet hair. I combed my hair and walked back into the bedroom. I found a tray on the bed with breakfast, aspirin, and a drink that looked like it could cure my hangover. I drank the drink without tasting it and took 3 aspirin. Then I grabbed my purse and got out my Heroin and quickly shot up knowing that I had to leave soon and wouldn't have time to shoot up after I had left.

I grabbed all my stuff and put on my heels and walked downstairs. I could hear them mumbling in the kitchen and I knew that they could hear me. I went over to the front door and hesitated. I couldn't leave without thanking Alice. I walked into the kitchen and was met by six pairs of golden eyes. I quickly scanned the room until my eyes fell on Alice. But I knew that I hadn't been looking for Alice and I assume so did the rest of the family. I looked Alice right in the eyes and said, "Thanks for all your help Alice but next time you kidnap me try to get my permission before you do." And with that I walked out of the room and up to the front door I was just about to open it when Alice suddenly appeared next to me and stopped me by placing a small ice-cold hand on my arm.

"Bella, could we talk to you for a moment before you leave?" I sat there for a second and then decided that I would get out of here faster if I listened to what they had to say first. So I nodded and followed Alice into the kitchen where I found the rest of the family (minus one) waiting for me. Carlisle started.

"Bella how much do you remember from last night?"

"Enough."

"All right. Bella we don't want to see you get hurt. We…"

"Well you really should have thought about that before you left me. You don't care about me. I'm just a play thing to you guys. Well I'm done getting played with. I'm out." I turned to leave but Alice stopped me. "You think that what James is doing isn't playing with you? Just hear us out Bella." I shook my head but went and sat down at the table anyway. I put my head in my hands and waited for the rest of their dishonest crap.

"Bella we just want to help you." I shook my head again and said.

"Bullshit. I know full well that you don't care about me. I'm not stupid and as far as I'm concerned you can all go to hell." They looked at me like I was crazy. I moved to grab my purse off the floor and noticed the blood that had started running down my arm. My arm had become infected and swollen where I had been injecting the drug into my system over the past couple of weeks. I almost laughed at the fact that it had decided that it was going to bleed right at the time that I needed and wanted to avoid it most.

Carlisle's gaze was zeroed in on my arm and then he looked up to meet my eyes. I quickly looked away knowing that my eyes would be fully dilated and a dead giveaway that I was high. Carlisle missed nothing though and I knew that I had to get out of here fast before I was officially screwed over by the Cullen's.

"I have to go." It was Carlisle who responded.

"Bella I really think that you should stay with us for a little while." I shook my head and stood so that I could leave but Carlisle had appeared right next to me and was holding on to my arm. He turned it so he could examine it thoroughly and then he looked right at me.

"Bella, how long have you been doing drugs?"I looked all around the room and then I saw the one person that I never thought I would see or even want to see ever again. Edward stood in the corner of the room with his eyes glued to mine. I saw his surprise when he looked me right in the eye and saw just how dilated my eyes really were. I looked back at Carlisle and said

"Hmm, I don't know what you're talking about." I was shocked when Rosalie snapped at me.

"Cut the crap Bella. We can all see that your eyes are dilated and that your "injection site" is bleeding all over the house. Don't insult us by acting as if you are the same innocent Bella that you were before we left." Each word that Rosalie spat out at me made me more and more livid and I finally lashed out at her.

"Oh shut up Rosalie! You have no idea what the hell you're talking about. You think that you are so perfect don't you Rosalie. Well I'm here to tell you that looks can definitely be deceiving and you are nothing but a perfectly stupid little whore. I tried so hard to make you like me because of other people in my life but now I'm simply fed up. I only have one thing to say to you. Mind your own F$#%ing business."

"Bella we have all gone through so much because you are just a worthless little human and…"

"Don't you dare tell me how much you have suffered Rosalie because you don't have any idea about what you are talking about! I have been through HELL Rosalie! For 8 straight months my life has been a living HELL, and I don't want to hear another word about how unfortunate your life has been simply because your hair isn't curling the way you want it. Rosalie don't you dare tell me how hard your life has been. Gee it must be so hard to be a beautiful vampire who never ages and who has more money than a small country at her disposal. You are a selfish bitch Rosalie and I don't want to hear anything else from you or the rest of your lying family!"

The entire Cullen clan was staring at me like I had just grown two heads and Rosalie looked so pissed off she could probably eat me and not feel any remorse. I was right. Rosalie lunged at me and it was only the fact that Emmett had grabbed her arm before she had jumped at me that kept her from ripping my head off. I smirked at her as Japer and Carlisle went to help and then I grabbed my purse and walked out of the dining room just in time to feel the wave of calm that swept through out the house. I tried to fight the feeling of calmness that went through me but I couldn't do it. I knew that as long as I stayed angry I wouldn't be able to feel the embarrassment or the pain that would be creeping up on me soon. I walked out the front door and began the long walk down the driveway. I didn't know where I was or how far it was back to the main road but I would find out soon enough.

I had gotten all the way to the main road before I felt somebody watching me and heard somebody following me. I kept walking afraid to see who was following me. I was terrified that it might be Edward. I couldn't handle talking to him right now. I kept walking a little longer and it wasn't long before he had caught up with me. I knew that it was him simply by the way that he walked by me and matched his strides to match mine. Finally I stopped walking and turned to look at him.

"What could you possibly want from me Edward?" I looked at his face for the first time in 8 months and saw how beautiful he really was. My memories didn't do him justice and I knew that I wouldn't survive it when he left me alone again. Edward's eyes were a bright golden yellow and filled with sadness.

"Bella I think that you should stay with us for a little while; until you get back on your feet." I looked into his eyes and saw that he really meant it. But that couldn't be possible because he told me himself that he didn't love me. I turned away and continued walking.

"Now why would I do that?"

"Because we can help you and we care about you." I stopped walking again and turned to face him.

"How stupid do you think I am? I got the message when you left the first time. Don't question my intelligence simply because I'm a human. I heard you when you told me that you didn't want me anymore and I can say that the feeling is mutual right now."

Edward stopped walking and reached out and grabbed my hand pulling me to a stop. I could feel the old electric charge run through my skin just like before. I looked down at our hands and then looked up at Edward. He looked incredibly serious and very handsome all of a sudden. I took a step toward him unconsciously and then I remembered what I had done with James and with Zach and Tanner and Josh and many more and I couldn't stand the thought of Edward touching me after I had been with so many other guys. I couldn't stand the thought of hurting him by telling him about everything that I had done. However a part of me wanted him to suffer right along with me. I closed my eyes and backed away. I pulled my hand out of his and turned away from him. Edward was walking at my side again and said,

"You can't honestly tell me that you didn't feel something just then."

"No Edward I can't, but I know it won't work out. And honestly Edward you're the one who broke up with me. I don't understand why all of a sudden you would change your mind about me and want me back. It doesn't make sense." I was walking when he grabbed my hand again and this time I didn't even want to pull my hand away.

"Bella please, just give us another chance." I wanted with all my heart to believe Edward but I didn't know what to believe anymore. Edward and his family were excellent liars. They had to be. With how they lived and with what they were they couldn't be anything but the best liars in the country. I looked into Edwards eyes and willed my brain to shut up and listen to my heart for once. But my brain was still there shouting at my heart that if the Cullen's left me once they could do it again. I finally understood that it wouldn't work out between the Cullen's and me.

"Edward I can't. I'm sorry but I don't think it's going to work out. I'm different now and it can never be how it was before. I have my own life and I am going back to it now. Good bye Edward." And then I did the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life and turned and walked away from Edward Cullen. I walked for a long time before I finally heard a car coming and I stuck out my thumb hoping they would stop and give me a much needed ride. The truck was full with three guys and two girls who were about my age and they pulled off the side off onto the side of the road and waited for me to climb in. I got into the truck without hesitating and made myself comfortable. As the car took off I looked in the rear view mirror in time to see Edward standing in the middle of the road.

I watched until Edward was out of sight before I took in my surroundings the car was full of beer cans and the two couples in back were making out in a drunken frenzy. I looked at the driver and saw that I actually recognized the guy from one of James's mixers. He eyed me and my dress in a way that made me wish I had thought to shoot up before I had gotten into the car. The boy offered me a beer and I took it without a second thought. I took a sip and scowled at the cheap drink. I felt like it had been watered down to the point where I wouldn't get drunk at all from one can. I chugged the drink and grabbed another without asking. The boy leaned over and said,

"Hey, I'm Jason. I think I've seen you before but I can't remember where."

"I'm Bella. I think that I saw you at a party I went to last week." Recognition lit up the boys eyes as he recalled the party and then he eyed me like I was a piece of meat. I didn't mind it though, I deserved it. Jason scooted close to me and put his arm around me as he got close to whisper in my ear.

"So my friends and I were just leaving a party and I was taking them home, but how about we go find someplace to hang out instead. Maybe we could get to know each other a bit better." I just nodded. I was too busy thinking about Edward for anything to register in my head.

We drove for about a half an hour and then we found a nice spot and parked the car. The two couples in back were still going at it even though it had been over an hour. I was pretty sure that they would either be taking clothes off or passing out on each other very soon. I chugged another beer and my vision blurred slightly. I took out my purse and quickly shot up with heroin and then I was ready for almost anything. Jason leaned over and grabbed my shoulders. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close. I readjusted slightly to become more comfortable and then his lips were on mine. He was good looking especially with all the alcohol that I had in my system and after the day that I had it felt good to have a release for all the pent up anger that I had harbored for so long.

I moaned when he bit my lower lip and quickly unbuttoned his shirt and ran my hands over his toned chest. I readjusted again until I was sitting on top of him and then I leaned over and kissed him thoroughly. I tilted my head back and sighed as he moved his lips from my mouth to my neck and then my jaw line. I pretended that I was here with Edward while the guy that I was with was sucking on my neck. I was momentarily distracted when I heard a noise but I was pretty far gone. I felt Jason's hand travel up under my dress and felt my body respond as he began groping me. I unzipped my dress until my torso was bare except for my lacy bra. And then the door flew off the car. One instant I was making out with a guy in his truck and the next I was spread out on the ground after being pulled out of the car. I looked up and saw that it was Emmett and he wasn't very happy.

"Emmett what the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm taking care of your stupid ass."

"I can take care of myself Emmett!" It didn't help the fact that my words were slurred almost to the point beyond recognition.

"Of course you can Bella."

I smiled and thought about how funny Emmett was and watched as he beat up the guy who had been groping me moments before. And yet somehow I didn't care. I didn't mind that Emmett had obviously been following me and I didn't care how cold it was. It was then that I realized how cold it really was. I looked down and noticed that my dress had been torn beyond repair. I swore under my breath and got unsteadily to my feet. My legs were shaking and the world seemed to be turning but I was determined to leave Emmett behind. I walked for what seemed like an eternity but then I turned and saw that I had only managed to get about twenty feet away from the car. I rolled my eyes at how ridiculous this whole scene must appear to someone who wasn't involved and then I tripped. I fell and landed right on the wrist that I had extended in an attempt to catch myself. I heard a sharp crack and then I felt a sudden burst of pain that did more than clear up my senses. I was suddenly very aware of everything that was going on as my mind became almost crystal clear from all the adrenaline that was rushing through my veins.

I examined my wrist and saw that it was already beginning to swell up to twice the size it normally is. I attempted to stand but then I saw and felt that my ankle was twisted. I swore again loudly and then Emmett was by my side. He picked me up and ran all the way back to the Cullen's estate and walked right past a very upset Alice. She looked sad and mad all at the same time. Emmett continued walking through the house until he got to Carlisle's study. Edward was holding the door open stiffly. If Alice was upset, Edward was livid and Carlisle was just as upset as Alice had been. Emmett set me down on the couch that was in the study and Carlisle came to examine my injuries.

"Well Bella you seem to have gotten yourself into another difficult situation haven't you."

"In my defense I didn't get hurt until Emmett showed up." Carlisle just looked at me like I was crazy.

Carlisle looked at Edward pointedly and Edward got up angrily and walked out of the room. He was back within seconds and he had a very large ice pack in one hand and a robe in another. Carlisle helped me into the silk robe and wrapped the ice pack around my ankle with an ace bandage. Then he turned his attention to my wrist. He had me attempt to wiggle my fingers and when I couldn't he placed his hands on my fingers and pushed them up and down one by one. The stream of curses that came out of my mouth would have made a seasoned sailor blush. I almost blacked out more than once as the pain became almost too much for me to bear. But I didn't. Carlisle finally told me that he could wrap it up really tightly and packed it up with ice but until the swelling went down he couldn't put a cast on it. I cried out when Edward picked me up as gently as he could. The slightest movements made my arm cry out in pain and made me sweat.

I pushed on Edwards's chest and yelled for him to put me down. The adrenaline that had been in my system moments before was all gone and I was feeling very tired and drunk. I struggled in his arms but Edward didn't put me down. I fought with him physically until he set me down on a very comfortable couch and then finally I fell into a very deep sleep.

AN: Hey everybody! I just wanted to thank everybody for reading my story so far and to ask for more reviews. I am stuck between two directions for this story right now and could use all the help that I can get in deciding. Just review and tell me what you thought about the direction the story is heading in, do you like it, do you want things to get better for Bella or worse? Please review. Thanks!


	6. Rehab

Chapter 6

Rehab

**EPOV**

I watched as Emmett carried Bella into Carlisle's office. I saw red as I took in Bella's current state. She had a fresh hickey on her neck and her dress was torn to the point of indecency and she reeked of alcohol and drugs. Bella's ankle and wrist were swollen from her clumsiness and the after effects of the alcohol combined. I watched and listened as Carlisle examined Bella and I was livid. Finally Carlisle got my attention and gave me very specific instructions.

"_Edward I need you to go and get something from Alice to help cover Bella up and a pack of ice to put on her ankle. Look Edward Bella is just going through a rough patch. She'll be fine. We just need to help her through it_." I ignored the last part but went and retrieved the ice pack and a silk robe from a very upset Alice. She held out a purple robe and a large ice pack to me without saying a word. Of course she didn't have to. Her thoughts were all but shouting at me that it was all her fault and that she should have seen it coming before Bella had gotten hurt. I didn't say anything to try to make her feel better. I knew that it wasn't her fault but I needed to blame someone or something; anything but myself and Alice was the obvious scapegoat. Her pain made me feel a slight release in the pressure that I felt on my chest.

I walked back into Carlisle's study and handed him what he had asked for. Carlisle helped Bella pull the robe onto her frail body and then he wrapped her ankle tightly with the icepack and then an ace bandage to hold it in place. When Carlisle turned his attention to her wrist I felt my heart throb for a moment. I felt pain and anger course through my entire body as Carlisle's medical mind took over and began evaluating the situation.

_Hmm there seems to be some hairline fractures in several of the carpals and there will definitely be some severe bruising. Wait until the swelling goes down and then put a cast on it until it heals. Her bones shouldn't break this easily, I wonder if she has been eating anything of nutritional value in the past months. _

Carlisle thought all of this in less than a second and began explaining everything that was going on to Bella. She looked like she was exhausted and having a hard time paying any attention to what Carlisle was saying to her. When Carlisle had finished explaining things to Bella I picked her up gently to take her to my room so she could sleep. Bella gasped as the movement jostled her injuries and the sound made my entire being hurt. I moved as quickly and gracefully as possible in order to avoid causing her even more pain than she was already in. Bella fought against me with all of her strength trying her very best to escape my embrace. I ignored her obscenities and struggles and took her and placed her on the big golden bed that had been recently placed in my bedroom. Bella fell asleep almost instantaneously after I had placed her on the bed and it gave me the opportunity to be with her without her yelling and glaring and giving me everything that I deserved.

I looked at Bella closely taking in every detail that made her what she was. She looked frail and far too thin. I could tell by her weight that she hadn't been eating enough ever since we left. I sighed as sadness and anger began to grow in my heart. I looked at her arms carefully and noticed scars covering both of the insides of her arms and the place where she had been injecting the poisonous drugs into her system. I could smell the sweet scent of her blood tainted by the alcohol that she had been ingesting all night. I wasn't thirsty at all. I couldn't even think of drinking Bella's blood while she was like this.

I looked up at her face and noticed that she had large dark circles around both of her eyes. It looked like she hadn't slept in weeks. Bella made a small noise and then turned her head from one side to the other. The action drew my attention to her neck where a large fresh hickey had developed. My thoughts became almost a jumbled mess as I looked and saw Bella in a heated make out session with a complete stranger that had picked her up, courtesy of Emmett. I would kill the bastard. He had another thing coming if he thought that he could get away with taking advantage of Bella like he had. I raced out of my room and down the stairs only to be met by Emmett and Jasper and a wall of calm and rational thoughts and feelings, courtesy of Jasper.

Carlisle was suddenly right in my face and saying something to me.

"Edward! Stop! Emmett already took care of those individuals! Show him Emmett." Emmett nodded and quickly thought about how he had beaten the guy within an inch of his life and then quickly thought about something that he had just recently seen on television. I stopped struggling against my brothers and nodded to show that I had regained my control and that I wouldn't be going anywhere anytime soon. I pulled out of their grasp and squeezed the bridge of my nose with my fingers. I thought about everything that I had seen and said,

"Carlisle what are we going to do?"

"Honestly Edward I don't know."

"Carlisle we have to do something soon! Did you notice the scars and cuts that covered the insides of her arms? She's been cutting Carlisle and taking drugs and drinking alcohol and probably smoking and sniffing everything from pot to Sharpies. We can't let this go on."

"I know son. Just give me some time to work through this in my mind. We'll get through this together as a family. I know that there are some things that we can do to help Bella, just let me think through it and get everything sorted out."

I watched as Carlisle left and headed for his office to think out a plan to help Bella and to make her better again. Then I turned my attention to Emmett.

"Man Edward you should have seen them in the truck! Bella was totally going at it. Frankly I didn't know she had it in her. I hope that she gets better just so you can get some of that..."Emmett would have continued but he was abruptly interrupted by my fist coming into contact with his face. I punched him in the face so hard that both his face and my hand cracked from the impact. I rubbed my hand ignoring the pain and then I left without saying a single word to him. He had taken care of the guy that had been groping Bella after all.

I thought about how everything was working out and I knew that this was all my fault. I couldn't even begin to describe how guilty I felt. If my family and I had never left none of this would have happened. But I had made the choice to leave and now I knew that I had to be a big boy and face the music. I had to do everything that I could possibly do to fix things. I had destroyed Bella by leaving and now I wouldn't ever leave again until I had returned things to the way that they were supposed to be. I felt bad and I knew that I owed it to Bella to help her pull her life back together again even if she didn't ever want me to be a part of her life ever again after everything that I had caused her.

BPOV

I woke up in a large gold bed with a killer headache and an achy body. I scooted over and swung my legs over the edge of the bed and collapsed right back onto the bed and onto my wrist. "SHIT!" I held my wrist that was wrapped tightly in an ace bandage close to my chest. I leaned over and looked at my swollen ankle that was also wrapped up tightly. I couldn't remember much of what happened last night but whatever happened couldn't have been good. I looked at the clock and noticed that it was about 4:25 am. I attempted to put weight on my ankle again but all that did was make my eyes water. I sighed to myself as I realized that the reason that I had woken up was to go to the bathroom. I had to pee but I was stuck in bed.

I thought quickly about what my options were. I could either call out for help and have to listen to them criticize me, or try and get there on my own. Waiting around and holding it just wasn't an option at this point I'm afraid and there was no way in hell that I was going to ask them for help. If they helped me then I would have to pay them back somehow and I hated being in debt. I quickly grabbed onto a chair that was close by and hopped up onto my good leg and took my time hobbling over to the bathroom that was connected to the bedroom. I made it to the bathroom and quickly relieved myself. I then grabbed the closest thing that was stable and hobbled out of the bathroom. I was almost to the bed when my foot got caught on the very thing that I was using to hold me up and I went face first into the floor. I closed my eyes and reflexively put both of my arms out to catch myself. The impact that I was expecting never came. I opened my eyes and felt myself in his strong arms. Edward Cullen had once again come to my rescue and I hated him for it.

Edward was making me fall in love with him all over again and I couldn't possibly take it anymore. He was looking at me with that look that he has and I was mesmerized. Being in his arms changed the way I felt about him. When I was away from him I could hate him all I wanted but when he held me and caught me in his gaze like he was doing I could never hate him. Edward looked down at me and looked from my eyes down to my lips. I knew what he was thinking and I wanted nothing more than for him to kiss me right then. I was still in his arms when he looked back up to my eyes to see what was there. I don't know what he saw in my expression but he must have decided that it meant that he was in the clear because he looked back down to my lips and leaned in close until our lips touch softly.

That kiss was soft and chaste but it made heat and passion explode throughout my body. I leaned into Edward as our lips moved together. I wrapped my arms around his neck and closed my eyes. I had been missing this. I knew that once Edward left again I wouldn't get through it because I couldn't live without him. However I knew that this kiss was worth it. I already knew that I wouldn't be able to live through a break up a second time with or without the kiss so I wanted to get as much out of it as I possibly could. I cut off the kiss and pushed away from him. Edward looked at me sadly and placed me softly on the bed. For the first time since I had seen him again I noticed a light in his eyes. I got under the covers and watched as Edward walked out the door and I knew that my heart was breaking all over again. I couldn't be with Edward again even if I wanted to because he was perfect and I could never match up.

A single tear escaped before I pulled out my cell phone and called the one person that I never thought I would talk to ever again. The phone rang twice before he answered it. I knew that he would be up though.

"Hey Dad."

"Bella!"

"Dad, I need you to come and get me."

"Bella where the hell have you been?"

"I'm at the Cullen's old place. They came back for the summer and I dropped by to say hi. I sprained my ankle in the process though and could use some help getting around."

"Bella you are in serious trouble. I'll be there in ten minutes and just so you know you are grounded for life."

"Bye Cha…Dad"

I hung up the phone and thanked whatever god that was in control that my father can be very blind when it comes to the matters of the heart. My father would never think that his sweet innocent daughter would get drunk and high and screw everybody in sight. I could definitely use this to my advantage. At least when I was at home Charlie wouldn't be suspicious about any drugs. I would be able to get high without any problems from the Cullens.

I knew that Charlie would be here within 15 minutes and I needed a hit before he got here. I found my purse on the floor next to the bed and I opened it to get everything that I needed. I gasped when all I could find was my wallet and drivers license. I couldn't even find my car keys. "SHIT!" I knew exactly who took all my necessities and I didn't like it. I got out of bed and limped down the stairs being very careful to take them one at a time.

"EDWARD F$%&ING CULLEN! WHERE THE HELL IS ALL OF MY STUFF?"

EPOV

I smiled when I heard Bella call my name. I truly loved this girl and I don't think my named ever sounded quite as sweet. I turned in time to see Bella hobble into the living room with a look that could kill on her face.

"Bella I don't know what you are referring to. All of your things are in your purse right where you left them."

"The hell they are! What makes you think that you can touch my personal things and go through all of my belongings and get rid of everything that you deem unnecessary?"

"Bella I didn't touch anything."

Bella rolled her eyes at me and decided that she didn't like my smug grin so she threw her shoe at me. I caught her heel and smiled again at the fact that I really hadn't touched anything. It was all Carlisle and Alice and I found it quite amusing.

I listened to Charlie's and Carlisle's conversation in the other room and found that our little argument was helping our cause. I listened to as Carlisle convinced the police chief to allow his daughter to receive the help that she needed.

"_Charlie, I know that this is hard to believe but I really do think that it is necessary." _

"_Bella wouldn't do any of that."_

"_Charlie normally I would agree with you but just listen to her."_

"Cullen you give them back to me you son of a Bitch! I will tear this house apart if I have to and I will find my damn drugs before I leave this forsaken place!..."

"_Alright Cullen maybe you are right. I guess that I will take her over there first thing in the morning."_

Hell yes! I thought to myself.


	7. Hell in a Hand Basket

Chapter 7

Hell in a Hand basket

**BPOV**

"REHAB! What the hell do you mean 'I'm going to rehab'?" As soon as Charlie arrived and had discussed MY life with Dr. Cullen without my knowledge I was escorted into Dr. Cullen's office with my father so that we could talk. I knew that the Cullen's were just being courteous by pretending not to listen and that in reality they were all listening with interested ears.

"Bella I don't know what else to do. Dr. Cullen has found drugs in your purse and on your person. It's illegal Bella and frankly I am shocked! I know that it was hard for you when they left but I never expected my sweet little angel to do something as reckless as trying drugs!"

"Dad I haven't done anything bad! I just wanted to have a good time."

"By killing yourself! I'm sorry Bella but I must not be hip anymore because I don't think that hurting yourself is a way to have fun." I knew that Charlie was a sucker for my "daddy's little girl" act and so I decided that I had to pull out the big guns.

"Daddy, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do anything harmful. Please I'll try and be better. I never meant to hurt anybody. I couldn't ever hurt you like that! Please can you forgive me?" Then I began to cry very convincingly and Charlie quickly embraced me.

"Baby it's all right. Of course I forgive you and I know that you didn't mean to. You're just young and naïve. I understand that things have been hard and that is why I am sending you to rehab. The people at the facility can give you all of the help that you need."

I couldn't believe it. I had acted all sad and innocent so that I wouldn't be sent to Rehab and Charlie was still going to send me there anyway.

"What! You are still going to send me to rehab? I thought that you loved me Dad!"

"I do love you very much and that is the main reason why I am sending you."

"I'm not going! I absolutely refuse to go! I am an adult now and you can't force me into anything."

"Bella you forget that I am a cop and I just found you in possession of illegal substances and I will take you before a judge if I have to."

"Like hell you will! I won't go! And you know what Charlie; I'm not the sweet little girl that you thought that I was! I have screwed half the male population within a 20 mile radius and I have been doing drugs since March! I have tried Heroin, Marijuana, Cocaine, and Crystal Meth. I have attempted suicide and I have cut myself before and you know what else? I don't give a shit about what you have to say. As soon as I get out of rehab you can bet that I won't come back! So I guess that this is goodbye Chief Swan! Good F-ing Bye!"By the time that I had finished my speech Charlie had turned a dark purple and I actually had a moment when I felt compelled to ask if he was all right. I left the study with every intention to just get into the car and wait for Charlie to take the long drive back to my personal hell. However as soon as I left the study I happened upon three very flabbergasted vampires. Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle were all waiting for me outside.

Charlie followed me out of the room and looked at Carlisle.

"Dr. Cullen, I know that this may seem as a little inconvenient but could Bella spend the night here? I feel like you are better equipped to handle this entire situation and I just don't have the emotional strength to do it right now." Carlisle looked at my father and said,

"Of course Chief Swan, it would be fine for Bella to stay here for a while. I think that it would be wise to give the two of you space to cool off. Why don't you head on home and get some rest? We'll keep her safe until you decide what to do next."

I glared at the vampires and limped upstairs to Edward's room and slammed the door before locking it firmly in place. I felt betrayed by the people that I cared for the most and I couldn't believe that I was stuck in another sticky situation. My hurt and anger made itself known through the silent tears that fell down my face. I heard a hesitant knock on the door but I didn't answer it. I didn't want to talk to anybody.

"Bella could you please let me into my room for a little while? I just want to talk to you a little bit."

"Leave me alone."

"Please Bella let me in."

"Just Go Edward." My tears turned from tears of anger to tears of frustration as I sunk down onto the bed and put my head into my hands. I didn't know what I was going to do. I felt trapped. I liked all of the bad habits that I had picked up but I missed some parts of my old life. I wouldn't admit it though. I knew that I couldn't go back. I was in too deep to go back and the truth was that I liked it. I felt frustrated but I didn't know how to fix it which lead to even more frustration.

I lay down on the golden bed and realized that it smelled like Edward. As much as I wanted to deny it I found myself laying there just to smell the pillows. I found his smell comforting and I needed it now more than ever because without it I just felt abandoned and alone. I eventually fell into a restless sleep and tossed and turned all night.

**EPOV**

I sat outside my bedroom door until I heard Bella's breathing deepen and I knew that she was asleep. I quietly unlocked the door and walked in silently. I walked over and found Bella in a haphazard position and I slowly straightened her out and I covered her with the top cover. I sat on the edge of a chair across the room and rubbed my hand through my hair as I thought about all of the thinks that Bella had listed off as she tried to hurt her father. I was particularly shocked by Bella's sex life and by the Suicide attempt. I couldn't even begin to imagine this new life that my Bella had entered into. I thought about a vision that had popped into Alice's head as soon as Bella had stated that she wasn't going to come back. In the vision Bella was at a night club with a young man who looked dangerous and she was definitely doing more than just making out with him. I saw red as I watched the scumbag defile my Bella. I couldn't even think about it without getting all worked up.

I got up and walked downstairs when I heard Carlisle call me with his thoughts. I walked into the kitchen and found my family sitting around the table. I took one of the last remaining seats and calmly waited for Carlisle's plan of action.

"Well I think that the best thing for us to do is send Bella to the rehabilitation center. " Alice suddenly went rigid in her seat and I watch her vision play out as Bella threw a huge fit when we told her that she was going to rehab and then she cried in the car all the way. When the vision ended I looked at Carlisle, who was waiting patiently and said,

"Let's do it. It's what's best for Bella. Alice just had a vision about her reluctance to go but I don't think it really matters at this point, Bella needs to go to rehab."

Carlisle nodded and said, "Alright we'll take Bella down this morning in a couple of hours. Alice would you mind packing a few things for Bella to take while I go and get a few things ready?" Alice nodded and raced upstairs to pack some essentials for Bella. I walked over to my piano and played out all of my fear and frustration. I played until I felt somebody watching me as I wrapped the song up. I turned on the bench and was surprised to find Bella watching me. I guess that I was so absorbed into my music that I didn't hear her come in.

I turned back and played a nicer piece. Not Bella's lullaby, I couldn't play that for her just yet. I would play that for her if she ever loved me again. I couldn't expose myself like that just to be smashed down by the only one that I have truly loved. As I played through the song I fed all my emotions into the music and I found that even though it was supposed to be a pleasant song it had turned into a very sad rendition that I have never played before. I turned around and found that Bella wasn't there anymore. I looked at the clock and found that it was about 6:00 in the morning and I knew that in just two hours I would have to put my Bella into rehab and I found that it was breaking my heart.

**BPOV**

I woke up to beautiful piano music that I knew could only be Edward. I climbed out of bed and went downstairs as quietly as I could. I walked into the piano room and found Edward there. I listened as he finished the song and he turned and looked at me before turning back to his piano and playing a happier song. That is, it was happier for a little while. Slowly as Edward became more involved with the piece the song transformed into a melancholy tune and I found that it was breaking my heart. I walked out of the room and found the bathroom. I quietly released my tears and all of my pent up emotions. I couldn't let Edward back into my heart. It just wasn't something that I could allow. I knew that it would just turn into regret if I let him get close to me at all and I couldn't live through another heart break.

I held out my hands and found that they were shaking profusely. And for the first time I realized that I hadn't had any drugs since the car incident about 5 hours earlier. I quickly searched in all my pockets and was relieved when I found a small pill in the deepest corner of my right pocket. I popped the pill into my mouth and found some relief as the ecstasy entered my blood stream. I watched in the mirror as my eyes began to dilate and I knew that the Cullen vampires would know that I was high. I hobbled out of the bathroom and found the head of the family waiting for me outside the door. He took in my eyes and he shook his head sadly then he picked me up and carried me into the kitchen to have some breakfast before they decided to do anything with me.

I stared at the eggs and toast before without even the slightest interest. I felt perfectly fine and I didn't care about what the Cullen's thought. Esme sat down across from me and waited for me to take a bite. I didn't move a single muscle as Carlisle came a sat next to his wife. I didn't want to eat and they were already taking away so many of my other choices. Carlisle finally decided to speak.

"Bella we have decided that you should go to the port Angeles Rehabilitation center. We have already packed a few things for you and Charlie has given his consent. We'll be able to visit you one day a week at the facility and we will be checking up on you regularly."

"Carlisle doesn't it strike you as odd that I am 18 and still don't get to do what I want. I don't think that this is even legal."

"Bella we are going to help you whether you like it or not. We love you Bella and want to help you."

"Bullshit!" I got up and walked outside and got into the black Lexus. I knew that running was pointless and I didn't want to be with the Cullen family anymore than I already had to be. I sat in the backseat and prayed that Carlisle would be the only one to accompany me to the center. I couldn't handle it if Alice or Edward decided to come along. I put my head into my hands when I saw Edward climb into the front seat.

Carlisle quickly followed and got into the driver's side before pulling out and speeding down the road. I leaned my head against the window and tried to stop the awful tears that were flowing freely down my cheeks. The last time that I cried so much was when the Cullens left the first time. I didn't like it. I cried the entire way to the center and I hated it more than anything.

The trip to the center was short and quiet. Carlisle tried to start up a conversation about the weather but I ignored him and Edward gave him one word answers and it was apparent that neither one of us really wanted to talk about what was going to happen. We drove into the city and then just as quickly we drove out of the city and turned onto an abandoned dirt road. It looked like the facility didn't want its patients getting away so easily. Great!

The center looked like a very old and large brick mental institution from the late 1800's and it gave me the heeby jeebies. I looked at all the windows that lined the face of the building and noticed a sad girl staring at us. I felt like I was in a horror movie.

Carlisle helped me out of the car and then led me into the scary building. The inside of the building looked like a nursing home and was comfortably furnished. Carlisle helped me sit down and then he went and talked to the lady that was taking care of the front desk. Edward came and sat beside me but I just ignored him. I didn't have anything to say to him.

A nurse that was very attractive and only a few years older than myself came to collect me. He introduced himself as Henry. I took one look at Edward and I knew that flirting with this guy would piss Edward off. I smiled nicely at the young man and began to flirt.

"Please call me Bella, _smile_, How long have you worked here Henry?_ Flip hair,_ Oh I think that this must be such an interesting job for you and you are just the perfect guy for it because you're so strong and dedicated…"

I flirted shamelessly and I made sure to wiggle my ass a little bit as I walked away with the young man. I peeked back at Edward as I was walking through the doors that separated the patients from the visitors and I was pleased to note that Edward looked Ticked!

**EPOV**

I knew that I had upset Bella but that didn't mean that she had to take advantage of her good looks. I watched as she flirted with the nurse and I watched as he flirted back. I watched as the nurse guided her back toward her room and I began pacing. I didn't like that nurse one bit. I didn't like the fact that he knew where she slept even more. Carlisle came up behind me and rested a comforting arm on my shoulder.

"Don't worry son. I am fairly certain that she has absolutely no interest in that young man."

"Carlisle I don't think that I can do this."

"Think about how Bella must feel. She is still convinced that she hasn't done anything wrong. But don't worry I have a friend flying in from Australia that is a world famous Councilor. If anybody can help Bella through this it'll be her."

"I hope that you are right Carlisle."

**BPOV**

I walked through the doors and was led to a large living room that was full of teenagers. Some were just sitting and talking, some were playing games and some were just sitting by themselves reading or writing. The nurse led me to a table full of teens and introduced me then left me on my own to face the new group of people. I sat down in an available chair and examined each face until I happened upon one that was very familiar.

"James! What are you doing here?" James smiled at me and shrugged,

"It was either this or 10-15 years in prison. So here I am."

"Do you have any merchandise with you?"

"Today is your lucky day miss Swan I happen to have a gift that I received from my beloved older brother that is just waiting to be opened."

I smiled at him and realized that this wouldn't be so bad after all.


	8. Highs and Lows

AN. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has read this story and those of you who have reviewed. Also I just need to formally apologize about the long wait. I kinda forgot about my stories for a while and just recently found some chapters on my computer that inspired me to finish this story. I would really love to get any feedback about my story and don't be afraid to dish out some constructive criticism. Quite Frankly I am having a bit of a writer's block for this story. Any ideas would be fabulous and greatly appreciated. Thanks again. I will definitely do my darnedest to update as soon as possible.

Chapter 8

Highs and Lows

**BPOV**

"Come with me!" I quickly followed James into the boys half of the facility and waited while he went into his room and returned with a box full of Oreos that had never been opened before. I took one look at the cookies and then glanced back up at James with my eyebrows raised. He smiled at me and then walked out to the back yard and found a small bench by the lake that was behind the center.

James sat down and then instructed me to open the package. I ripped it opened and found the Oreo cookies just like I fully expected too. I looked at James and he smiled again.

"It's not what it looks like. Here…" James pulled out a cookie from the right column and twisted the cookie apart. James angled the cookie slightly so that I could see the inside before he quickly placed the treat in his mouth. Inside the cookie there was a fine layer of white dust that was barely visible. I smiled at him and said,

"What was that?"

"It was Heroin; each cookie in the right column is coated with about a pills worth of the drug. The middle column is Meth and the left column is just plain old Oreo cookies so that if somebody wants a closer look I will have a better chance of getting away with it. Pretty brilliant huh!"

"Brilliant? This is absolutely ingenious. Who's helping you?"

"Well I don't exactly like to advertise that I am able to pull in drugs from the outside. I don't rat out my helpers either. If I started doing that I wouldn't be able to find anybody to help me out and then both you and me would be screwed."

I nodded in understanding and then asked the most important question.

"How much?"

"300 a cookie."

I nodded and then thought about my savings in the bank. I thought that I would have enough to cover a few weeks worth of cookies but I didn't know for sure. I didn't want to have to make a special arrangement with James but I would if I had too.

"Just a heads up, they have us take a planned drug test every Monday and Friday morning. They throw some random ones at us sometimes but they don't do it very often. Usually they do it right after they get a new inmate just to shake em up a little bit. If you don't pass they will search your room and pull you in for questioning. They search your bags constantly anyway and they don't let you bring anything in from friends or family without a thorough investigation. Group counseling in on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 12-6 depending on what group you are in and if you don't go they add extra one on one sessions which in my opinion is worse than getting your teeth pulled and should be avoided at all costs. If you have a clean slate and good behavior you will get out of here pretty fast and if you have a break through or a self discovery you'll get out even faster.

"Good to know."

"yeah, if you need anything else let me know."

"Wait James, I can't get you the money right away but I can make it worth your while. Can I have a cookie?"

James looked at me for a long while but he finally nodded. Alright come to my room tomorrow night at around 2:00. We'll see what we can come up with. But in the mean time I think that it would be better if you stayed away from me. If the nursing staff sees us together constantly they'll get suspicious and I don't want to get nailed if you don't pass a drug test because you timed it badly. Get the picture?"

I nodded and then got up and started walking back to the facility without looking back at my own personal angel. I knew that now I would be okay. My only problem was a certain vampire who happened to have the ability to see the future. If Edward or Carlisle found out that I was a crack whore I think that they would flip their lids, but I would do everything in my power to avoid getting caught. I looked down at my cookie and twisted the cookies apart. I placed the cookie on my tongue cream side down and reviled in the ecstasy that seemed to envelope me as the heroin entered my system. I smiled to myself as I realized that this whole rehab thing was going to be a complete cakewalk.

The next day the nurses brought out sterile cups and had everybody line up. James was right, it was only Wednesday and they decided to bring in the drug test to scare me into obedience. I didn't like it one bit. I wasn't worried about the drug test even though I knew that I couldn't pass it even if my life depended on it. I had only just arrived here yesterday and I knew that I would tell them that I got them from my amazing drug dealer before my "friends" found out and shipped me off to "get the help that I needed". It was something that they would believe. They wouldn't think that I had gotten a nice high from heroin right here in their "secure" facility and I would be all right. I didn't know how James was going to pass but frankly I didn't care. I didn't even think that they would be able to find anything even if they did search his room.

After about an hour or so of just waiting in line they handed me a cup and sent me into the bathroom with the instructions of not flushing the toilet or washing my hands until I had brought my urine out for them to inspect. I peed in the cup and put the lid on securely before tossing it to the drug screener. I waited and waited until I couldn't stand it anymore.

"May I please wash my hands? I don't try and make it a habit of pissing all over my hands and then not washing them." The drug screener just nodded and I went back into the bathroom and flushed the toilet before washing my hands thoroughly…twice.

When I walked out the nurse that I had flirted with was waiting to escort me to a counselor's office. Apparently I had failed my drug test miserably…Big surprise there. I was lead into Counselor Johnson's office and came face to face with a middle aged balding man who smelled like cigarettes and cheap cologne. He saw me come in and even though he was talking on the phone he motioned for me to sit down to wait.

"…Yes Doctor I understand the necessity as well. Don't worry Doctor we will anxiously await your arrival. Mmhmm. All right we will see you shortly then. Yes goodbye Dr. Cullen."

The mention of Dr. Cullen directed all of my attention toward Counselor Johnson. I couldn't handle it if they came in and took away my drugs a second time.

After Counselor Johnson hung up the phone he turned his full attention on me. He stared at me for a moment with a calculating gaze and I stared right back. Finally he looked down at the file on his desk and I smiled at the subtle victory of mine.

"Well Miss Swan, it appears that you failed to pass your drug test this morning."

"Yes well I did just get sentenced here yesterday. What do you expect? There is a reason why I was sent to rehab and it wasn't because I was stone cold sober." I rolled my eyes at his stupidity and waited for my punishment.

"Isabella I am perfectly aware of your record and how long you have been with us. Do you know who I was just talking to on the phone just then?"

I decided to play dumb so I looked at my nails and said,

"I'm sure I haven't the slightest idea."

"That was Dr. Cullen; one of the best doctors in the country and quite possibly the world and you know what he said?"

"Nope, but I am sure that you are going to tell me."

Counselor Johnson was not amused by my attitude but he decided to press on.

"He told me that a certain guest from Australia who happens to be an expert with hopeless cases such as yourself is coming to help out. He also told me to tell you that if Alice tells him anything else then he was going to send in his own personal assistant to watch you 24-7"

My eyes narrowed as I took in the last message from the Cullen family and then I grabbed my bag and stood up and headed out the door. I turned back at the last second and said, "Please send my regards to the Cullens and tell Alice that she can kiss my ass and that Edward can go to hell. Thanks ever so much Counselor. "

I went to my room and lay down on my bed and drifted off into an uneasy sleep and dreamt only of Edward Cullen for the next few hours.

I woke up around 1 AM and figured that I might as well head over to James' room now. I slipped out of my window and began making my way across the dew covered grounds until I found my way to his first story window. I knocked on the window lightly and waited until he lifted the window and motioned for me to come in. I climbed in and sat down on the small bed and leaned back against the wall waiting. James leaned in to kiss me and I made sure to make it a very enthusiastic kiss in case a certain psychic pixie was watching. I felt his tongue in my mouth and leaned into him as his hands made their way to my butt. To say that the make out session was hot and heavy was an understatement but when I had had enough I quietly snuck back into my room and went to be smiling.

"Rise and Shine Sleepy head!" I groaned as I recognized the high pitched voice of the dark hard pixie and pulled my pillow over my head. Alice pulled the pillow away from me as I groaned louder before cracking my eyes open.

"Alice what the HELL are you doing in my room at 5:00 in the morning! Are you completely INSANE!"

"Well lets just say that this is my response to the invitation to, and I quote, "tell Alice that she can kiss my Ass.' Well congratulations Bella you just bought yourself a one way ticket to Cullen 24 hour care. We are going to have so much fun."

"Shit."


	9. Karma's a Bitch

Chapter 9

Karma's a Bitch

Alice was relentless and unforgiving. I crawled out of bed and saw that she had laid out an outfit for me and I laughed in her face. She had chosen a pink cardigan with a black and white polka dot skirt and 3" white peep toe pumps. She simply smiled wickedly at me and left the room to allow me to get dressed. I laughed once more at the amusing thought of me wearing that particular outfit and went to my closet. I almost passed out. My closet was full of pink everything. My clothes were nowhere to be found. My choices were limited to the shorts and tank-top pajamas that I wore to bed or something that either June Cleaver or the girl from the T-Mobile commercials would wear.

"Alice, What the Hell is this!" I moaned as I heard her laughing through the closed door. I put my head in my hands for a moment and then decided that if Alice was going to play dirty then I was too. I grabbed my black lacy bra and matching thong and put those on first. I then pulled on my skirt and rolled the waist band until it was a mini skirt making sure that it sat low enough on my hips that my thong peaked through in the back. I pulled on the sweater next over my bra and buttoned two buttons just below my bust allowing my bra to be seen and my mid-drift to remain bare. I smiled to myself and put on my make-up and did my hair and walk out to a very annoyed Alice.

I looked like a slut but Alice had it coming. I walked out into the common area and was met by more than one stare. I smiled and chose a table that was full of guys. One by one they moved so that I could have a seat. I raised my eyebrows at their open-mouthed stares and said, "Well, what's on the agenda for today boys?" Before they could answer a heavy hand fell on my shoulder and I turned to see the male nurse once again with an awed look on his face.

"Ms. Swan Counselor Johnson wishes to speak with you." I rolled my eyes but followed him anyway. I couldn't possibly imagine what more the little bald man had to say to me. I walked into the office and was met by the counselor with a stare that made it clear that he was uncomfortable with my outfit. I sat down in the chair and smiled as I put my feet up on the desk and almost made the poor counselors eyes pop out of his head.

"What's up doc?" For a moment he was speechless until an annoyed individual that I had failed to notice cleared his throat. I whipped my head around so fast only to see an irritable looking Edward Cullen dressed in the same light blue scrubs that the rest of the staff wore.

"Isabella, In light of recent events Dr. Cullen has decided that it would be much more beneficial for you to have 24 hour assistance from his personal assistants until his specialist arrives."

"WHAT! WHY?"

"Well, it seems as though Dr. Cullen received an anonymous tip from someone that you are getting drugs from the inside. I highly doubt this considering the fact that we have state of the art security but Dr. Cullen thinks that it's necessary and it's better to be safe than sorry I suppose."

"He has no proof. He can't just expect me to sit quietly by and be babysat by this cretin when I have done nothing wrong."

"Ms. Swan there is nothing that I can do. Now you have a few hours before group therapy begins, why don't you look around and make some new friends?"

"Whatever!"

"Bella, I wish that you wouldn't take this so hard. Carlisle just wants to help you." At the sound of his voice I whirled on him.

"No, Not one word out of you! It's bad enough that I'm stuck with you but that doesn't mean that I have to listen to you. Don't speak to me again." Edward smiled sweetly at me and then the male nurse made a very convenient entrance.

"Ms. Swan is there a problem here?"

"Why no…Ryan." I read his name tag. "I was just discussing politics with my personal assistant and we found that we disagree on more than one political figure." I placed both of my hands around his arm and gripped tightly. I decided that now was my shot to torture Edward to my hearts' content. I watched Edward's jaw line tighten as I placed one hand on Ryan's chest and whispered in his ear. I made sure that my lips were making contact with his skin when I began to whisper knowing that Edward could hear every syllable I uttered.

"Ryan, why don't you come to see me when you're off duty? I might just need a little cheering up and I think that you are just the one to help me out."

"Miss,…I don't know…if that's..such a good idea."

"Why not? I promise that I will make it worth your while." I smiled and leaned in and kissed him thoroughly and then turned and walked away without looking back. I walked over to James once I made it to the courtyard and I gave him a kiss that definitely involved some tongue. I giggled when he put his hands on my butt and I kissed him again until Edward cleared his throat. I flipped him off but stopped kissing James anyway. I smiled sweetly and walked away. Once we were away from everyone else Edward put his hand on my shoulder and pulled me to a stop.

"What are you doing Bella?"

"Minding my own damn business unlike you!"

"Bella please w.."

"Stop it Edward! Just Stop! You gave up the right to have any input on my life the second you decided to leave. You made it very clear that you didn't have any more feelings for me and I've finally gotten to the point in my life that I don't give a shit about it. Now leave me the Hell alone Edward Cullen!"

"Bella I never stopped caring for you! I had a few things that I had to sort out but I never gave up on you or on us. I'm in love with you Isabella Swan and there is nothing you can do about it."

"We'll just have to see ab.." Suddenly Edward leaned in and kissed me cutting me off mid-sentence. I froze. I had no idea what to do. Edward pressed me up against the wall and I felt his tongue glide across my lower lip. I sighed giving him the time to invade my mouth. Mentally I was completely unaware of what was going on but my body seemed to have a mind of its own and responded accordingly. I reached my hands into his hair and pulled him closer to me. Edward's kiss was the only thing besides Heroine that made me feel good again. He made me feel like me again and I hated him for it. I broke the kiss to get some oxygen and just like an adrenaline rush everything became crystal clear. I look up at Edward panting and saw his smug smile. I slapped him with my good hand across the face as hard as I could and walked into my room without looking back. I slammed my door on Edward Cullen and sat on the floor before I started to cry.

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